What You Need Me To Be
by paynesgrey
Summary: More than anything, Ritsuka wants to be a good boyfriend.


AN: Written for my "misty rose" prompt for the Summer Mini Challenge 2019. One-shot, though there may be a sequel in the future.

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What You Need Me To Be

Ritsuka wanted to be a good boyfriend to him, but he was nervous, and more than anything, he lacked experience. The reality of that always weighed down on him whenever he spent time with him. Mafuyu was the more experienced one, of course, and Ritsuka didn't know what the boy expected of him.

He was a man, so obviously he wanted to be intimate with Mafuyu. He wanted to kiss him, and hold him, and maybe someday soon, even ravish him and translate all the desires and feelings he felt of him into physical means.

Until then, Ritsuka poured his tension into his music. He'd hear music to his struggles, to his fears and desires, and he hummed them, composed them, and transformed them into something in which he did have experience: songs.

"Oh, Uenoyama-kun, I like this song," he said as Ritsuka strummed idly at his guitar. He thought Mafuya was catching a quick nap in his room while they worked on music, so Ritsuka had let him sleep and moved onto the other songs that buzzed in his head: songs about how much he craved Mafuyu.

"Ah, yeah, I just started that one," he said, feeling warmth coloring his cheeks. Mafuyu peered at him curiously.

"Shall I... help you with the lyrics?" he offered, and Ritsuka stared at him surprised. Mafuyu always had issues with lyrics. He had as much trouble expressing himself as Ritsuka did. Man, what a pair they were.

"Uh yeah, of course," he said in a heavy breath. Mafuyu cocked his head at him, waiting in silence as if he sensed there something more that Ritsuka wanted to say.

He was right of course. "The song is… well, it's about you. Here," he said, and he couldn't form the words yet, so he decided to play for Mafuyu the one song out of his frenetic thoughts that he'd finished. Mafuyu listened patiently, and in the corner of his eye, Ritsuka saw Mafuyu humming as he played, his fingers absently stroking at his guitar strings. Music was flowing through him to his boyfriend, and Ritsuka marveled at his talent once again.

When he was done, Mafuyu regarded him with those wide eyes of devotion and awe. "Wow, I love it." He paused and began humming the song again, and he closed his eyes as if grasping onto the feelings, the notes, and the melody and painting it into words in his head. Ritsuka watched as he grabbed a discarded paper from the floor, and he turned it around and began scribbling.

Ritsuka watched him, reading a few words and some phrases, wondering how Mafuyu was going to piece it together.

Mafuyu met his eyes and said, "Could you play it again?"

Ritsuka nodded, and then he let the music consume him, energy flowing from his heart into his finger tips, strumming his guitar and bringing it to life, breathing like a dragon sleeping within him.

When he finished, Mafuyu was no longer scribbling down words. He was staring at him; his cheeks were painted with a misty rose hue.

"Uenoyama-kun…" he said. "May I… kiss you?"

Ritsuka swallowed a lump in his throat and then nodded. Something snapped within him, and before Mafuyu could rise from the floor, he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend's shoulders and pulled him close, covering his mouth with his. Mafuyu met his intensity, their lips tasting each other, their tongues opening them up and finding warmth and wet. Mafuyu moaned, and the sound shot straight down to Ritsuka's groin.

He suddenly felt hot and hungry, and he only knew that he wanted more.

Soon, he was leaning Mafuyu back onto his bedroom floor, covering his body with his. Mafuyu arched up against him, opening Ritsuka's legs with his knee and rubbing his growing heat.

It was his turn to moan, and Ritsuka's almost choked at the sound he made. Mafuyu chuckled as he trailed his tongue down his boyfriend's neck, nipping and tasting his salty skin.

"Mafuyu…" he said, pulling his boyfriend's mouth back to his, devouring him and holding him tight against him.

For a moment, Ritsuka pulled away, nuzzling his nose on Mafuyu's as they panted and caught their breaths.

"I'm sorry," Ritsuka said. "I want to be… good for you, but I'm… I don't know what I'm doing. You're the first… that I've..."

The words fell short in his breath when he felt Mafuyu's soft touch in his hair, stroking his head lovingly. "You are good for me, Uenoyama-kun. Whatever you do to me...I'll love it."

"God, I want you," Ritsuka said, holding back the tidal wave threatening to crash through him and turn him into some wild animal. He rubbed his face against Mafuyu's cheek and then began grinding their hips together. Mafuyu moved with him, creating a friction that began to drive Ritsuka mad like a demon. He gasped when he felt Mafuyu's fingers deftly draw a line down his spine. He shivered and held him tighter, as if he'd never let him go. "I want to ravage you and then leave you breathless. I want to drive you crazy just how you do to me."

Ritsuka heard a hitch in Mafuyu's breath, and then his boyfriend moved under him and embraced him lovingly. "Yes, yes, I want that too." Ritsuka closed his eyes and inhaled a deep breath.

Mafuyu spoke again as if he was reading Ritsuka's thoughts. "But you want to take it slow, don't you? I know. We'll figure it out together."

Ritsuka pulled away and looked into his gentle boyfriend's eyes. He smiled and nodded. "I love you, Mafuyu."

"And I love you…" Mafuyu said, and he carded his fingers through Ritsuka's hair before pulling him gently down toward him. "Now kiss me again. Kiss me until the end of your song."

Ritsuka hummed in affirmation, and soon he was tasting Mafuyu's soft lips again, listening to his sounds, and pulling him so close that all he knew was Mafuyu - sinking into his skin, seeping into his brain, and digging deep into his heart like a peaceful melody that would never ever fade.

END


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